Hide Away

Does anyone in your life know the real you?

We all wear masks and it is difficult to let down your guard and share yourself completely. Is there anyone in your live who knows you without the mask?

asked by user Cherryheart on SoulPancake.

I’m the only person who knows my real self. But hey, that’s me taking into account all the useless information that people do not need to know about me such as what I think about before I go to sleep or what I eat for breakfast on Sundays (Well, there’s Twitter for that).

The explanation of the question on SoulPancake reminded me of a song by Anberlin called “Pray Tell.” It talks about how people essentially “hide away” their true selves from other people for whatever reason (Fear of prejudice, desire to fit in with other people, etc). The people who really know me are the ones that see through the masks that I wear.

In my opinion, only a select few actually know my real self. Basically, these people are also the people I’m closest to. They’re my family and my closest friends. Most of them, if not all, know what my motivations, inspirations, and fears are. They’re also the people who know the most random information about myself. For instance, my best friend from first year high school knows about how I would consider myself as a cat, if I were an animal (Now you know, reader).

I consider myself as someone who fits into that category of awkward socially inclined people: ambiverts. As a friend puts it, I can either be an introvert or an extrovert. I can either be studying Java programming in the library or hanging out with fellow Ateneo Musicians’ Pool members at a bar in Katipunan Avenue. I feel awkward speaking in front of a class in school but feel exhilarated when I play drums in front of hundreds of people. I feel uneasy when I’m with this bookworm friend I have a crush on when I can get along with people who are different from me.

Of course, that whole ambiversion thing going on is exactly the mask that I wear. Sure, I have my own ways of being outgoing. I’ve learned to become more adventurous in life, really. But I’ve always naturally been an introvert. The people who know the real me probably know that. And they probably knew it even before I realized it myself.

06-18-12 Edit: This is another one of what I consider to be my half-baked writings (made for my English class). Edited some stuff here and there. [vague] ‘Cause humor is lost when it is explicitly stated in a joke. [/vague]

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